Monday Movie Review - ANNA AND THE APOCALYPSE

Once upon a time, there was a TV show called Buffy, the Vampire Slayer. I was and still am a huge fan. In season 7, the show's creator, Joss Whedon, took a brave step in creating an hour-long musical entitled "Once More, With Feeling", in which the entire cast sang instead of spoke. The resulting "Buffy Musical" was a huge hit.

ANNA AND THE APOCALYPSE reminds me so much of that episode.

Anna is a typical teenager in her senior year, a loner of sorts, who is anxious to escape her small town after graduation. (Note: Although this takes place in Scotland, the teen angst and struggles are the same, no matter what country.)

What she and her small band of friends never see coming is the end of the world, aka zombies, and right before Christmas. Yes, this is a holiday musical zombiefest. The songs they sing as they battle the advancing hordes are spot-on, echoing their fears, their hopes, and the realization they may not make it out alive.

I fell instantly in love with the music and lyrics, and with the movie by the third song. I immediately bought the soundtrack. The movie itself is not yet available on disk, but as soon as it is, I'm going to get it. 

Which is why I wholeheartedly recommend (and you know I rarely do this!) that you

Monday Movie Review - EXTINCTION

I love aliens from outer space coming to decimate the world type of movies. Two of my favs in that genre are Skyline and Battle: Los Angeles. For me to wholly endorse a movie, I need one of two things to happen. I either need to be hit broadside with a plot twist I never saw coming, or an ending that blows me away.

This movie did both for me.

If you watch the trailer, the editing department does a bang-up job hooking you. Yes, this is an alien invasion movie. Except it's not. And I won't go any further because I always promise no spoilers.

In short (to quote the blurb from IMDB), A father has a recurring dream of losing his family. His nightmare turns into reality when the planet is invaded by a force bent on destruction. Fighting for their lives, he comes to realize an unknown strength to keep them safe from harm.

Here it is, days after watching this flick, and I'm still thinking about it. I'm going back to re-watch it for all the little "clues" I missed the first time around. And then I'm going to do what I recommend you all to do - and that is to

Monday Movie Review - CARGO

Back in 2013, I highly recommended a short 7-min. film called "Cargo", featuring a father trying to protect his infant daughter after he's being bitten by a zombie. (Link here.)

Now, five years later, the original creators of that short have made a full-length feature film, this time starring Martin Freeman, of Hobbit and Sherlock fame.

When was the last time a horror movie made you cry?

The story has been expanded, but the premise is the same. Martin, as "Andy", is trying to find a safe place for his daughter, Rosie, before he succumbs to whatever is causing people to go stark raving. I also have to give kudos to the people who created these monsters (no CGI, by the way. It's all in-house makeup!) These "zombies" have touches of originality, including burying their heads in the ground in order to "hibernate", and the yellowish fluid they exude from their mouths and eyes as their insides putrefy.

To add the cherry on top, this takes place in Australia, which makes the perfect backdrop for this post-apocalyptic wasteland.

This story will tear your heart out, and in a good way. Which is why my two-thumbs-up recommendation is that you

Monday Movie Review - JIGSAW

I have to admit, I've always been a huge fan of this series. Even though some of the installments weren't as "up to par" with others (very few series are), on the whole this has been one fantastic ride. And a lot of that success, in my opinion. is due to two factors -- the ingenious traps used to kill people, and the somewhat convoluted story line that makes you think, even long after you've seen the movie.

JIGSAW takes place ten years after John Kramer's death. But when evidence to the contrary shows up with regards to a series of murders, no one can quite believe a dead man is still turning out these gruesome trophies.

This one makes you think. And, to be honest, I didn't quite see the ending coming. Overall, this "new venture" into the world of creative killings is just as inventive and entertaining as its predecessors.

Which is why I'm not just saying you should rent it, but instead I'm advising that you

 and add it to your collection.

Monday Movie Review - THE GIRL WITH ALL THE GIFTS

After viewing the trailer for this movie, I knew I had to give it a chance. Anything that would take me away from the shambling, plodding zombies ala George Romero was refreshing. Now, don't get me wrong. I love The Walking Dead, but after a buttload of movies with similar themes, I needed something different.

The Girl With All the Gifts is more along the style of 28 Days Later. It also takes place in a post-apocalyptic London/England/UK. And these infected are the scary as shit, fast on their feet, vicious kind.

The movie stars newcomer Sennia Nanua, and the girl just shines. It also stars Gemma Arterton and Glenn Close.

In short, it's about a spore-like infestation that's turned most of the population into running dead. However, there is a group of young children who were infected before birth, but are able to still reason, learn, speak, and write like normal children. The government is studying them to find out why they haven't completely turned into blood-craving crazies (although, if provoked, they tend to beast out until their cravings are filled).

I won't go into detail about this movie, but the ending isn't what I expected. Neither do I know how closely it follows the book by M. R. Carey, on which it's based. But I will tell you this. If you are a big fan of the 28 Days series, this is one should be on your keeper shelf.

Which is why I suggest that you

Monday Movie Review - BONE TOMAHAWK

When a man's (Patrick Wilson) wife is kidnapped by renegades the local Indians call "Troglodytes", the sheriff (Kurt Russell), his deputy, the man, and the woman's old boyfriend team up to hunt for her.

This is a long movie with a slow build, but the interaction between the main characters is great. The language they use is somewhat archaic, but fit for the time period.

The horror scenes are extremely graphic, if infrequent. But I also caught myself rewinding, just to make sure I saw what I thought I'd seen.

Initially, I was going to recommend a hearty RENT IT. But this movie is sticking with me. Which is why I switched to:

If for no other reason than to add it to my Kurt Russell collection. The man gets better looking as time goes on.

Monday Movie Review - COOTIES

I love dark humor, but lately the influx of dark humor horror movies have left me a bit high and dry. But after viewing the trailer to Cooties, I decided to give it a try.

I love this movie!

Elijah Wood leads this cast as one of several elementary school teachers who have to fend off a hoard of infected children after the cafeteria fed them tainted chicken nuggets. The "teaching remarks" are so relate-able to this retired teacher, and the in jokes fly thick and fast. (Can we say Hobbits?) Plus the gore is plentiful for those of you who like their meat served raw and with plenty of sauce.

Which is why my hearty recommendation is that you

Then invite your horror buddies over for an evening showing.

Two small notes: The movie ends with a perfect setup to a second movie, which I hope there will be. And there is an extra scene at the very end of the titles.

Book Review - The Matriarch by Kevin Ranson

Glenville Normal School - 1919
Sarah Louisa "Sis" Linn, class of 1877, is brutally murdered in her home on the school's campus. No motive or murderer is found. 

Glenville State College - 2013
Nearly 100 years has passed since Sis Linn's unsolved murder. The school's name has changed, and the story of her death and tales of her apparition have become fodder for frightening incoming freshmen. But a century is merely a moment for a spirit - and less than a blink of an eye for even more sinister entities that endure beyond the grave. Student Janiss Connelly will soon learn that not only are some ghost stories true, but that there are greater things to fear in life - and in death - than ghosts.

This is one damn spooky book.

To say anything about this book would be revealing too many plot points, but let me make a few things clear. 

First, I'm not a big fan of vampire stories because for me that old saw had long lost its teeth. Too many authors simply write the same thing over and over. Or so I thought until I read this book. Mr. Ransom has spun his own unique version of these toothy beings, and he's created creatures who are both believable and who fit perfectly into this modern world. 

Second, you are taken further into the story from the vampire's perspective. You see their side of immortal living, from the pain suffered when they are hurt, to the comforting unconsciousness of lying skin-to-dirt in a grave. 

Third, there are good vampires, and there are bad vampires, and sometimes they fight each other because of what they are, and because of what they believe in. Some are ruthless, portrayed as soulless like their movie counterparts, but others are struggling to cope day to day with their existence.

I bought this book on recommendation, and I'm delighted with what I discovered. Get your own copy. And when you do, throw away any previous beliefs you had about these undead beings, and enjoy!

Monday Movie Review - 100 Bloody Acres

 

It's been a while since I've written a movie review. Frankly, there's been little I've seen that's inspired me to write one. That was, until I came across this little jewel on iTunes.

100 Bloody Acres is an Australian film filled with black humor and horror, and I loved every minute of it. Two brothers own a small business fertilizer company, and times have been tough. They've resorted to picking up road kill to add potassium to their mixture, until the day came when they (for some unfathomable reason) decided to pick up a few human bodies they'd found after a tragic car accident. Voila! The mixture proved to be so popular, they were suddenly besieged with orders. Thus making them hard-pressed to keep up with the demand...until one day when younger brother Reg came across three young adults stranded on a deserted road. Hmm, if road kill worked so well, why not try freshly killed? It sounded like a good plan, until Reg started getting sweet on the female of the trio.

The gore is intense, the blood is plentiful, and even I caught a lot of the relevant Aussie humor. You buy into the characters, and their problems and their relationships. Best of all, the accents aren't so thick that you can't understand the dialog. I only wish I could have seen some outtakes or heard the director's comments during the film. I'm hoping when the movie is released on DVD, those juicy bits are included.

Which is why my rare but firm recommendation is that you

Monday Movie Review - THE DAY

I was expecting another survivors vs zombies story. Not only was I surprised, but I was blown away by the intensity of this film.

THE DAY takes place within one twenty-four-hour cycle. Five post-apocalyptic survivors find an abandoned farmhouse out in the middle of nowhere, and use it to take refuge from a rainstorm.

In the course of their rest, it soon becomes that the house isn't really abandoned. To make matters worse, their fight isn't against monsters. It's against their fellow men. Men who now hunt other men for their meat. For the world's population has been reduced to two groups: the killers, and those who would end up feeding them.

A lot of the kills are CGI, and sometimes they become too "obvious". But overall, the washed-out look and feel of this film is raw, real, and upsetting. Which is why I strongly suggest you

 

 

 

Monday Movie Review - RARE EXPORTS: A Christmas Tale

Starting out as short short films for the internet quickly grew a cult following, and spurred a full-length feature film. And I'm so glad it did! By "holiday rights" I should have reviewed this flick before Christmas, but in truth this movie can be watched at any time of the year.

Many great horror films are coming from other countries not typically thought of as producing horror (see "Troll Hunter" from Norway). "Rare Exports" is from Finland, and this flick will throw every American perception of Santa Claus right out the window.

Basically, it's the story of a drilling company breaking through layers of ice to find a "creature" centuries old. Taking the creature, still encased in ice, to a special facility, the company has no idea it has also unleashed the "elves" destined to protect the creatures. These elves look like our Santa, except they're dirty, they're naked, and they eat raw flesh.

I was completely mesmerized by this movie. Note that it is in Finnish, with English subtitles, but that didn't deter me from thoroughly enjoying it. In fact my whole-hearted recommendation is that you

and make it part of your yearly holiday must-see flicks!

Monday Movie Review - Predators

I loved the first one with Arnold.  Wasn't too keen on #2.  And as for the others that came down the pike, I became less and less enthused by the franchise.  (Although I have to admit I wasn't too disappointed in the Alien vs Predator movie with Lance.)

However, when I saw the line-up for this version, and the trailers, my hopes were revived.  And I was not let down.

Some of the meanest, battle-hard, and blood-thirsty killers from Earth are transported to an alien world to become targeted prey for a group of Predators.  I got the impression deep into the movie that this alien world was not the Predators' home world, but more of a playground.  A place where they can practice their hunting techniques.  What they didn't expect was for the humans to give as good as they got.

Adrian Brody gives a surprisingly good performance I didn't quite expect.  There were also several surprises in the revelation of new Predator species.  And I didn't see the ending coming, another big plus in my book.

All in all, I wholeheartedly recommend you buy the very first movie, and this one.  Those two will pretty much be all you need to get your fix.

Monday Movie Review - MACHETE

This movie never existed when its trailer was shown during the grindhouse double-billed "Planet Terror" and "Death Proof".  But because of fans clamoring to see Danny Trejo as Machete, and Trejo himself calling director Richard Rodriguez on a regular basis wanting to know if the movie would be green-lighted, it pretty much became a sure thing.  And, boy, am I glad!

First off, this movie is chock full of famous faces.  It seems every ten minutes another one pops up on the screen and tears through the scenery.  Second, this is not so much a horror movie (although the blood is plentiful and the decaptitations/eviscerations are more hilarious than horrendous) than it is an all-out brawl that never stops.

This is one slam-bang, full-of-fun movie that just begs to be watched on the big screen with a living room full of friends, a trash can full of popcorn, and a keg on ice. 

Which is why you'll never go wrong to just go ahead and 

Monday Movie Review - RESIDENT EVIL: AFTERLIFE

Forget that this movie was in 3D.  Again we have a kick-ass, blow-'em-up, nuke 'em, balls to the wall movie that made Milla Jovovich a multi-millionaire, and for damn good reason. She's good, she does the majority of her stunts, and you don't know what the hell she's going to have to face next.

In this case, it picks up where movie #3 left off.  It's a smooth transition, and as far as I could tell, there are very few plot holes left unfilled.  In #4, Alice finds out that their sanctuary named Arcadia is not in Alaska, as believed in #3, but it's a huge tanker.  But before she can reach Arcadia, she meets up with an old friend, or two, and makes new ones hiding inside a penitentiary.  Hey, what's more secure than a maximum security prison?

Although, IMHO, the 3D effects were weak, there were enough special effects and surprises to overcome them.  And, dammit, this movie drops off just when things start looking good, promising a #5.  Which is why my recommendation is that you go ahead and

You know you will anyway.  Oh, and keep an eye open for a special cameo about one minute into the end credits.

Book Review - TEN LITTLE ZOMBIES

This one is not for the kiddies, but it's hilarious fun.
You can get it here on Amazon.

Oh, go get it!  You know you want a copy!

Monday Movie Review - MONSTERS

At first I had high hopes for this movie, especially in the wake of Cloverfield, and with the soon-to-be-released Skyline.  But the film didn't turn out exactly the way I thought it would.

A photographer down in Mexico is trying to get up-close shots of the Monsters that landed 6 years ago.  While there, he is called by his boss and told that boss's daughter was on vacation in Mexico, and got caught up in one of the attacks.  "Go find her and bring her back to the US."

The photographer finds her and tries to bring her back, but that means crossing the Infected Zone, which is a section of land hundreds of miles wide and long, and lying directly between the border of the US and the interior of Mexico.

What entails is their journey as they traverse through the dangerous territory to reach the US, encountering rogue militia, the ghastly remains of people and towns, and of course the Monsters, which resemble walking octopi to me (no spoiler here, folks.  You can see it in the trailers.)

This is not a horror movie filled with gore.  It hits above the collar, messing with your mind.  It fills you with "What if it was me?".   It makes you think.  It makes you cringe.

My first inclination was "meh", but the more I think on it, the more I realize I want to go back and view it again.  And again.

Which makes my recommendation: 

Monday Movie Review - SURVIVAL OF THE DEAD

Romero's zombie movie seesaw back and forth between being flat-out horror and black comedy.  To me, I like both, especially the films that have a bit of tongue-in-cheek (both literally and figuratively).  Survival of the Dead is the latter, with lots of little short escapades that pit the living against the "dumbass dead".

You also have to give the King of the Zombies credit for giving us something different in each of his movies.  In this film, the story takes place on an island where two families have been feuding for years.  And now that a zombie plague has taken over, they're split into two camps - one side wants to kill everyone infected, but the other believes that zombies can be taught to eat other creatures besides humans, and thus they don't need to be eradicated.

Enter a small group of well-armed and trained military survivalists.  They're made to pick sides, and it's definitely a no-win situation.  The gore is profuse, and I liked the never-before-done zombie attack on an animal (I will leave the rest to your imagination.)

If you're a zombie fan, especially if you're a Romero-an, this movie will click for you.  Yes, it has some stumbles, but overall it's just plain fun.

My whole-hearted recommendation is that you:

Monday Movie Review - REC 2

Thanks to a friend's notification, I was able to catch this on HD cable for its one-night-only showing.  Unlike the original REC, which I watched dubbed, this one was in Spanish with subtitles.  I didn't mind, though. It got to the point where I was too busy watching the screen to pay any attention to what they were saying anyway.  After all, it was pretty much the same thing:  Hurry!  Run!  We've got to get out of here!  Ahhh!  (And, of course, the frequent f-bomb.)

This story could legitimately be called REC, Part 2, since it takes place 15 minutes after the first film ends.  The horror and gore have been cranked up, but the story heads down a path I really wished it hadn't.  (Not a real spoiler here, folks:)  A priest is brought into the building, and he convinces everyone that the "infected" aren't really infected with anything manmade.  They're possessed.  We even see a few tight scenes of attempted exorcism.

But other than that one minor quibble, this movie is unabashedly in your face frightening.  And the ending will leave you with a sick, vomitus feeling in your stomach - I promise!

My recommendation? 

In fact, get them both!

(Psst!  Side note, as of this blog, yes, there will be a QUARANTINE 2, the American version to follow this Spanish release!)

Monday Movie Review - THE CRAZIES

I remember reading a review for this movie while it was still in production that said this movie should never have been remade.  It was lumped into that horrific pile labeled "remade classics", the likes of which included Rob Zombie's Halloween and the new Nightmare on Elm Street.  And I was among those who put this movie on my Do Not Rent list simply because I have an overt fondness for the originals.  But when I found out Radha Mitchell was going to star in it, I became intrigued.

You see, I've never seen Romero's original of this movie, so I really had no personal experience to go by.  As time went on, and I began to see movie stills and the teaser trailers, my interest grew.  Finally, I decided what the heck.  Let me see if there's any merit to the movie by its own account.

Oh.  Damn.  And in a good way!

True, it's another one of those "oops, the government goofed and dropped some toxic cargo in a small town's water supply, so now the military is having to come in and contain the populace before word gets out" sort of movie.  But the director has taken this scenario and put some real chills into what could have been a lackluster film.  The victims don't turn into zombies, but into crazed killers who slowly disintegrate before our eyes, leaving you as the viewer unable to decipher who's infected and who's not.

I may rent the 1973 version, just to compare.  But in the meantime I heartily recommend that, for this version, you

Monday Movie Review - THE DESCENT, Part 2

Notice the title says "Part 2"?  Not "The Decent 2".  That's because this isn't a second telling of the first movie.  It's a continuation.  In fact, it starts with only a couple of days having passed between the end of the original, and this one.

When the sole survivor emerges from the caves beneath the Appalachian Mountains, rescue workers force her to go back under to help rescue others of her party who may still be alive.

I will say, if you've seen the first movie, then the original terror of facing the subterrainean dwellers is not the main focus of this movie.  In fact, you KNOW the rescue workers are going to come face-to-face with the creatures.  And you KNOW some of them (or all?) are going to die.  It's waiting for that shock and thrill that makes this movie as good as the original, in my honest opinion.

Get the set! Then watch them back-to-back. The two blend seamlessly!

Which makes my recommendation: