Monday Movie Review - THE 16TH EPISODE

A trio of friends run a video blog involving haunted locations, especially in exotic locations around the world. On a trip to Casablanca, Morocco, they encounter a group of people who promise to show them around the city. It isn't long before the trio finds out the group has nefarious plans involving satanic worship and demonic possession.

I'm really not a big fan of demonic possession movies, but I have to give this film credit for going about it in a totally different way. In addition, the main bad guys are given some background, enabling you to see how deeply evil and depraved they are.

And the ending? Let's just say it doesn't conclude in ways you'd expect.

There is copious blood but few scares. Most the horror is psychological. 

All in all, my recommendation is that you give it a try, but

Monday Movie Review - I TRAPPED THE DEVIL

A couple arrive at the man's brother's house in time for Christmas, but there is no festivity here. The brother's overwhelming paranoia and fear is immediately evident to them. And when he confesses he has a man imprisoned in his basement--not an ordinary man, but the Devil himself--they don't know whether to think he's gone mad, or to believe him.

This movie is a slooooooow burn as the tension builds toward the final act. The actors are excellent, as is the overall look and feel of this film. There is no gratuitous blood and gore. No monsters or CGI. But when I finally saw the Devil, I remembered what the brother had said.

"He took the form of a man."

At that point, I wondered why in hell the brother had taken the Devil in that form in the first place. And then I realized there was a whole new horrifying angle to this story that we may never know.

This movie left me with more questions than I started with. But because it's more of a psychological thriller, my recommendation is that you

Monday Movie Review - WHAT THE WATERS LEFT BEHIND

You know how, if a book or movie becomes a smash hit, a hundred knock-offs will soon follow to try and take advantage of that success? Well, consider this movie number one hundred and one.

This movie's cool title, cover art, and premise sounded interesting enough for me to rent it. Several young (and one slightly older) adults head for Epecuen, Argentina to do a documentary about the place, with regards as to its impact on those who lived there. The site is a real location. In fact, check it out and read about its history. It's rather fascinating.

What I didn't expect was to find myself watching another version of "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre".

Now, I have to admit, it wasn't a bad little movie. There were some good effects. The acting was okay, if a bit over the top in some places. And it's in Spanish with English subtitles (for those of you who prefer the dubbed versions.) 

If you don't mind watching a Spanish version of TTCM, go for it. Otherwise my recommendation is that you:

Monday Movie Review - CATSKILL PARK

Warning! Shaky cam video!
Lots of screaming.
Lots of running around in the woods in the dead of night.
Lots of flash-bangs and blinding lights.
Lots of whining, "What are we going to do?"
Lots of yelling, "I don't know!"
Lots of "Put that camera down!" and "Stop filming me!"
Lots of blurry images and loss of video.
Lots of people disappearing, reappearing, disappearing again.

But the acting is decent, despite everything else. Makeup effects aren't bad. And there's a pretty neat spaceship.

My recommendation: If you like this sort of movie, or you have absolutely nothing else to watch,

Monday Movie Review - VERONICA

I'm very cautious about films other people rave about as being among the Top Ten Best, or as being "one of the most horrific movies" they've ever seen. Having read some rave reviews about this one, I took a chance.

Veronica is about a teenager who, along with two of her friends, uses a Ouija board during an eclipse to allow her to speak to her recently deceased father. Unfortunately, another spirit, one very malevolent, comes through the portal they inadvertently open, and it attaches itself to Veronica. As she tries to understand what happened, and subsequently fights to undo what she caused, the spirit focuses its attention on her three younger and more vulnerable siblings.

This film is an import from Spain, so expect subtitles. The acting is top-notch all around. The effects are great. And there are a few jump scares. But other than the first five minutes, which raised the hairs on my head, there was little else to get excited about. 

This movie is reportedly based on a true incident, which made for interesting additional reading. But overall, my recommendation is that you

Monday Movie Review - PYEWACKET

The artwork first caught my eye, and the blurb sounded promising. After the recent death of her father, a young teen and her mother are trying to cope, but the two are at odds with each other. Unable to take her mother's demands any longer, the girl decides to place a death curse on her mother. Immediately, stuff starts to happen, and the teen decides that maybe that wasn't such a good idea. But when she tries to remove the curse, the pyewacket goes all out to prevent her from doing it, and sets out to fulfill the girl's initial wish.

The acting is decent, particularly the lead roles. And, as you've probably already heard, this is a slow-burn film. A very slow burn. Don't expect much blood, and there's no overt gore because the horror is 90% psychological. Some really good effects are in this film, there are a couple of jump scares, and the ending is satisfying. But overall, it's not the type of film I would watch again.

Which is why my recommendation is that you 

Monday Movie Review - THE EVIL WITHIN

This movie can be summed up in seven simple words:

What the f* did I just watch?

In 1977, David Lynch came out with a movie called Eraserhead. Not only was this flick one of the weirdest, most disturbing works I'd ever seen, but it's managed to stick with me after all these years.












The Evil Within reminds me of that movie in that the effects are enough to send you into a tailspin, and you stick with the story just to see what the hell is going to pop up next.

I must give special kudos to the actors, especially Frederick Koehler, who plays the lead character, a mentally impaired young man named Dennis. With all the craziness going on around them, they manage to keep the film planted on solid ground. But, damn!

If you like the bizarre, and I mean that with a capital B, you might want to rent this one. Otherwise, my recommendation is that you

One way or another, you HAVE to see this at least once!

Monday Movie Review - KILLING GROUND

This Australian film reminded me a lot of Wolf Creek in that it's brutal, it's bloody, and it's unrelenting once it gets rolling. Of course, it takes a few minutes for you to realize what's going on, and why the movie is tracking the way it is (no spoilers here!). But when it all starts to come together, the ending is totally unexpected.

This tells the story of a young couple who decide to go camping in a remote lakeside area. When they get there, they find the place has another tent set up. But they figure the beautiful spot has enough room for the both of them. What follows is their story and the story of the family who arrived first, and what happens to them all.

Unlike Wolf Creek, there is no satisfactory conclusion, and you're left with one honking huge question at the end. Which also allows the filmmakers to go with a sequel if they choose (isn't that the way it usually is for horror movies?)

Overall, it's well-made and well-acted, which helped make this flick as disturbing as I found it to be. However, because it's so slow in executing (no pun intended) any action scenes, it would be better if you chose to

Monday Movie Review - Alena

First off, let me warn you that this is a Swedish movie with subtitles. I know subtitled movies turn a lot of people off, so heads up on this one.

Secondly, also be warned if someone says, "If you liked 'Carrie' or 'Let the Right One In', you'll like this movie." Yes, this flick is very much like a mash-up of those two, in my opinion. Then again, it was nothing like them.

I really don't like movies with a lot of bullying, especially by over-the-top bad guys (or in this case, girls). So I was a bit turned off by this slowly paced film. I realize the director did so to help ramp up the suspense. Unfortunately, I knew what the answer was barely halfway into the show.

This pic is about a young woman named Alena who enters an all-girl school after being kicked out of her previous one. She excels at Lacrosse, so the coach gives her a chance to be on the team. But in doing so, placing her there knocks off the one girl without a kind bone in her body. Said girl then goes on a rampage to inflict harm upon Alena. What the girl doesn't realize is that Alena has a guardian angel of sorts who has no problem protecting Alena from those who would try to hurt her.

It's really not a bad little film. There is some gore, but not much, and some lesbian love action, but not graphic. Which is why my final vote is that you:

Monday Movie Review - HERE ALONE

Think The Road with zombies. Instead of a fast-paced flick with slow-moving infected, we get a slow-paced movie with rampaging, running dead. 

This story is told with some flashbacks. Ann and her husband and baby escape to the dense forest of upper New York state where her husband shows her how to survive in the wilderness. Inevitably we discover what happens to husband and baby as the film shows us Ann trying to cope with being totally alone.

Eventually she meets up with a father and stepdaughter. From that moment, all bets are off that everyone can get along swimmingly. And the ending was one I wasn't expecting.

To me, the flick tended to drone on a bit too much, but it had to in order to get across the feeling of absolute isolation and rising fear.

I liked it, but would I watch it again? Probably not. I won't say don't give this one a try, but my final verdict is that you

Monday Movie Review - XX

I like anthologies, especially if I recognize the name of a director/writer/actor whose work I'm familiar with.

XX is four tales that's female gender oriented. Each tale is directed by a female, and the lead role is female.

Unfortunately, although I believe the intention was good, the outcome is not. These four tales basically go nowhere. A couple of them I feel would have done better if they'd been a full-length feature instead of a twenty some-odd minute shortie.

"The Box" is somewhat satisfying, but the ending bombs, IMHO. "The Birthday Party" made no sense. I kept wondering aloud why the woman didn't call the cops. "Don't Fall" would have made a decent full-length feature. But as it stands, there are too many questions left that need answering. The fourth tale, "Her Only Living Son", is the best of the four, but again the ending left a lot to be desired. In fact, I kept backing up to re-watch it several times, hoping to make sense of it.

A decent attempt. I hope there will be more in the future. But for this anthology, my final verdict is that you

Monday Movie Review - STAKE LAND II

Originally titled The Stakelander, this sequel to the successful, highly entertaining, and original Stake Land is, in my honest opinion, a decent film, but much more of a downer than the way the first movie ended.

Once again we get to see Martin pair up with Mister (with the original cast members), and go about trying to rid the world of crazed zombie-like vampires. But I could help but feel The Walking Dead had influenced much of what the film ensues. There's a compound of survivors, the group of self-righteous men who believe they should be the absolute rulers of everything, and an ending that didn't leave me satisfied.

Yes, there's plenty of blood and few decent kills, but overall I don't feel the need to rewatch it.

Which is why my suggestion is that you 

Monday Movie Review - CONTAGION

I was all set to see another major kick-ass story about a virus nearly destroying the world's population. I loved "Outbreak" and hoped this one was another edge-of-your-seat nail biter.

Contagion is none of this. But neither is it a bad movie.

It starts on Day 2, where an American woman re-enters the US after a business trip to Japan. She is ill, and everything she touches immediately becomes contaminated. The film continues forward one day at a time, two days, then a week. In the process we see how the virus spreads so rapidly, humanity can't cope. Violence breaks out, and millions upon millions of people die - including the stars. That fact alone blew me away. Six major A-list (and most of them Academy Award winners) in this flick, and some of them die in the movie. Wow.

If you're looking for gore or scary effects, you'll be disappointed. The film is slow, very slow. But the acting is superb. There is a lot of tension and suspense. There's a poignant happy ending. Oh, and all questions are neatly wrapped up in the final five minutes.

But because of its very slow yet methodical pace, my recommendation is that you

Monday Movie Review - DYLAN DOG

I reeeeealy wanted to like this movie, and in some ways I did. It's very tongue in cheek, and Brandon Routh looks hawt, especially with his shirt off. But for some reason it just fell a bit flat.

Routh plays Dylan Dog, a protector of the dead, including vampires, werewolves, zombies--you know, the usual. But a past personal incident has made him swear off the job, and instead become a normal private investigator tracking unfaithful spouses and such.

Right off the bat his close friend and partner is killed, along with a very prominent man, and immediately Dylan realizes the two deaths are related. Soon afterward, his now undead partner emerges to rejoin him, and the rest of the movie is a visual connect-the-dots taking the viewer from one locale to another, since this all takes place in New Orleans.

To me, the best part of this movie was Marcus, the undead sidekick, played by Sam Huntington. There's a lot of wise-cracking going on. The gore is minimized, which is surprising considering the theme of the movie. The whole thing is played for laughs, even though most of the jokes fall flat.

However, I know that, eye candy-wise, when it comes on one of the movie channels, I'll probably watch it again. Which why my recommendation is that you also

Monday Movie Review - APOLLO 18

My first impression? It's sloooooooooooowww.
My second impression? It's "Paranormal Activity" on the moon.

Three astronauts go to the moon on a secret mission from the Dept. of Defense to plant spy bots on the moon (as opposed to launching the bots into space as satellites.) The two that land to do the grunt work come across some implausible and indistinguishable tracks other than their own, and then realize there is someone...or something...else there with them.

I have to give kudos to the actors who did their best. Having unknown actors (to me) play the parts always help with the buy-in factor. But some of the scary parts just didn't feel scary enough to me. The gore is minimal. The effects were terrific, and for the most part I truly felt like I was watching gathered and edited footage. But for all its hype and anticipation, I wasn't really satisfied once it was over. But in all honesty I can't condemn this film.

Therefore I'm carving a new tombstone for my recommendation.