Monster Pens

Aren't these cute?  Found them at Office Depot. 

Nothing like having a little monster or alien to write with.

Monday Movie Review - THE COTTAGE

If you like black comedy like "Shaun of the Dead", but without zombies, this is the movie for you.

What starts out as two guys kidnapping the daughter of their rich boss just for the ransom money goes hilariously wrong, but the entire movie is played very straight and very tongue-in-cheek.  It seems the cottage they take the girl to (who more than once wipes the floor with their asses before she's subdued) is right next door to the abode of a serial killer.  Once the killer finds out they're there, he goes after them.  It becomes the killer after the kidnappers after the vicitm.  Then the victim and kidnappers vs the killer.  Then...  Well, you get the drift.

The acting is fantastic, since I wasn't familiar with any of the actors.  The gore effects are superb.  It's a UK film, so there might be times you'll have to rewind just to double-check what was said. 

But on the whole, this flick makes for super entertainment.  Which is why I whole-heartedly recommend that you: 

Merry Bloody Christmas!

Horror 4 Sale

I was given these two movies.  They're brand new, still in their original package, and never been opened.

Each is $3, which includes postage.

To order, go to my secured website.
****

FACE

A serial killer is burning away the flesh of his victims with acid, leaving only the bones behind. The police turn to Hyun-min, a former forensic sculptor adept in reconstructing faces by examining and interpreting skulls. With the victim's bones in his house, Hyun-min's daughter begins to experience disturbing visions. As he races against time to find the answers and save his daughter, the deadly truth behind these victims reveals a sinister conspiracy that threatens everyone involved.

SILK

Armed with a newly invented material called the Menger Sponge, a paranormal investigative scientist, Hashimoto, and his team investigate a crime scene.  He captures the energy of a ghost: an unidentified 13-year-old boy.  Who is this ghost?  Why does it kill people? As they get closer to solving the riddle of the boy's past, he learns the horrifying truth.  Fearing that the ghost child is dangerous, the team decides to isolate him, but in doing so they unknowingly unleash a mysterious force, a much more powerful and ferocious energy to which the boy somehow seems connected.

 

Monday Movie Review - TRAIN

A group of American college athletes are over in Europe, participating in some games.  The night before they're supposed to head to another country via railway, they go on a bender and end up having to take an alternate train, since they missed their original departure.

What they don't know is that this train has no intention of letting them arrive alive at their destination.  They're young, they're strong, and that means they're perfect victims for a group of crackpot doctors to kidnap, torture, and ultimately use their body parts and organs in a weird donor-transplant scheme.

There is one lone female who survives, and it's through her eyes we see all the carnage inflicted upon the college students. 

Think "Midnight Meat Train" with a female hero.  Think of any mad slasher/serial killer who chops up countless victims, while a single teenage girl manages to elude his clutches, only on a train.

I have to admit, the gore is pretty spectacular, but the biggest problem sticking in my craw was the fact that these people would slice open and extract organs from their still-living victims without any kind of sanitary containment whatsoever.  The walls are grimy, the slabs are caked in dried blood, and the whole place reeks of filth, and we're supposed to believe these organs are being placed in other people, and those people survive?

This movie also has places where it drags, but all in all it would make for an okay viewing on a lazy weekend.  That's why my recommendation is that you:

'Tis the Season To Be Ghastly

You have to give credit to Damnation Press.  Their greeting cards and t-shirts available on CafePress are a hoot!

See their complete line here.

Zombie Safe House

You gotta admit, this concept art and ingenuity is phenomenal!

Found at io9.  Go check out what else they have, and friend them on Facebook!

Monday Movie Review - SLAUGHTER

Once again we have a "based on true events" film.  Good, bad, or indifferent, I was following this along pretty well until it got to the ending.  Or "ending", because this film really doesn't end.  There is no Happy Ever After.  There is no feeling of reaching a satisfactory conclusion whatsoever.  I guess that's why this movie continues to intrigue me.

In brief, Faith is trying to escape a brutal boyfriend by moving to a new city.  At a nightclub, she meets up with Lola, who appears to be in the grip of another heartless boyfriend, and helps her to get the creep off her back. They strike up a friendship, with Lola inviting Faith to her farm (said farm raises and slaughters pigs).

When Faith's boyfriend appears in town, Faith asks Lola if she can move in with her.  Lola agrees, and the two form a fast, almost sister-like friendship.  That is, until Faith finds out about Lola's past when it comes to her family and past boyfriends.  And that's when things start to get UGLY.

This is a movie filled abuse and torture.  It's graphic, but not over the top.  The acting is worthwhile, and I can understand how this film became one of the selections for the After Dark Horrorfest.

My recommendation is that you

One More for the Road from Bent Objects

Seriously, folks.  You have got to follow this guy. His imagination so totally off the wall, think Gary Larson with paper clips.

More Vegetable Nastiness from Bent Objects

Website/Blog
Go follow!

Monday Movie Review - MALEVOLENCE

According to IMDB.com, this story is the 2nd part of a trilogy, which makes me excited for part 1 to show up soon (Entitled "Bereavement", it's in post-production as of this writing.)

Malevolence begins 20 years after the kidnapping of a young boy by a serial killer.  The killer takes the child to the basement of an abandoned slaughter house (which is right next door to the killer's own home - go figure.)  The killer teaches the boy how to be a vicious murderer...and the film jumps forward 20 years.

A quartet of out-of-luck-and-work schmucks try to rob a bank.  One gets shot, and they spread to the four winds to avoid being caught, with plans to meet at "a place out in the middle of nowhere" in order to divvy up the dough.  Umm, bet you'll never guess where this "place" is.  Oh, darn!  You figured it out?

Anyway, a serial killer who appears to live there begins to  stalk them.  Guess who is under the mask!  Gee, good guess!

Will someone explain to me why serial killers go after their victims like they're swimming through waist-deep mud, while the victims are running faster than Olympic sprinters?  And why is it a normal person can get shot, knifed, and clubbed, and DIE, yet it's a mere flesh wound for killers?  It makes you wonder if there's a Michael Myers Survival School for Deranged Killers.

This movie is cliched and predictable.  The acting is so-so, and the gore effects aren't worth mentioning.  However, the premise of part 1, how the original killer turned an innocent young boy into his protege, looks a lot more promising.

In the meantime, when it comes to part 2,

A Different Kind of Magical Mystery Tour

For those of you who have ever tried to imagine the Beatles as zombies, here’s your chance.  A friend sent me this pic, and while I was googling, trying to find who to credit for the lithograph, I came across some really creepy imaginings of the Fab Four.

If you feel like surfing the net, type in “zombie Beatles”.  Then sit back and have fun!

Fairy Tales by Miwa Yanagi

Japanese photographer Miwa Yanagi has come up with some fantastic photos in tribute to her love of American and Japanese fairy tales.  Check out her site here for more (including the "Windswept Women".)

For those of you who don't know, the orignal story of Red Riding Hood by the Brothers Grimm told of the wolf eating both Red and her grandmother.  It was Red's screams that brought the woodcutter to the grandmother's house to investigate.  Upon seeing the wolf lying sleepily on the floor as it tried to digest its meal, the woodcutter chopped off its head, then split open the animal's belly, to reveal Red and her grandmother still alive inside.

Monday Movie Review - RAW MEAT

If you think you're watching a Hammer Film from the 70s, you're not, but this flick feels and looks and quacks just like one.

Decades ago, a group of miners working in the underground tunnels, digging the subway systems, are caught in a cave-in.  Back then, women were allowed down there, as well as the men, so that when the unfortunate group was unable to be rescued, they were able to survive and multiply anyway.  And here comes the only "glitch" that I could see in this whole thing.  If the inbred survivors were able to survive on hunting down hapless people venturing into the lower depths, why couldn't they have emerged out into the open, thus freeing themselves?  I mean, the whole point of being "trapped" below where there was nothing to subsist upon but rats and each other.  So how were these people able to start taking down fresh victims?

Aside from that minor squabble, the movie is rife with gory scenes, most of them very convincing.  The acting is top-notch (except for the hero, who often feels stilted).

More than that, don't be surprised if you find yourself rooting for the "villian".

That's why I suggest you give it a try and 

New Link! HORRORLAND

I've added a new blog link.  Check out HORRORLAND: The Macabre Side of Horror

Happy Thanksgiving!

Monday Movie Review - SKYLINE

It's so sad to see a promising movie not live up to its potential.

I braved the theaters to see Skyline in all its extra-wide glory.  In my opinion, films like this need to be viewed in that kind of setting.  But despite how beautiful the movie was shot, no matter how good the acting was, no matter how convincing the CGI effects were, Skyline just didn't deliver.

To summarize: A couple from New York fly out to LA to visit a friend and co-partner in a new business venture.  That night they're awakened by strange blue lights, and the fact that their apartment tower is shaking like its in the center of a major earthquake.  Truth is, Earth is being invaded by aliens, who are sucking up the human inhabitants for consumption.  With really nowhere to go, the four friends are basically sitting ducks waiting for the inevitable to occur.

Halfway through I found myself comparing it Independence Day and Cloverfield, which I'm sure others did as well.  Yes, there were a few scary moments (one of which is in the trailer/commercial, and was totally ruined for us.  Note to filmmakers - Don't Do That!)

Then ending, however, left me completely dumbstruck.  It was a payoff this romance lover never saw coming, but I was struck by its implications.  Which is why I'm going to buy me a copy of this flick (second hand), if nothing more but to re-watch it for those last few minutes.  Otherwise, my suggestion is that you

Book Review - TEN LITTLE ZOMBIES

This one is not for the kiddies, but it's hilarious fun.
You can get it here on Amazon.

Oh, go get it!  You know you want a copy!

"Porcelain figurines for your zombie grandma's mantel"

You'll never look at your grandmother's porcelain figurines the same way again.

Or, better yet, you might want to try what Jessica Harrison has done to her collection.

Go over to io9 and check out the rest of them!

Monday Movie Review - SEVEN DAYS

Sometimes torture horror hits home, and sometimes it misses.  This one hit home.

This Canadian French film (with subtitles) tells the story of a surgeon whose 8-year-old daughter is raped and murdered by a known pedophile.  The father makes arrangements to kidnap the criminal before he goes to trial, and give the man his own form of justice.  The title refers to the fact that the father informs the police that in seven days (which end on what would have been the daughter's 9th birthday) the murderer will be killed, and then he'll turn himself in.

This is not one the high-action, extremely bloody and violent films that you might see if it had come from the U.S.  This is a deep, intense study of human nature.  Of the power of love.  Of the strength of commitment.  Of vengeance.  Of the difficulty in dealing with an untimely, brutal death.

Yes, there is graphic content, and you will squirm at what the father does to the rapist.  But you will also find yourself cheering for the surgeon.  And you will commiserate with him.

Which makes my recommendation to be a wholehearted

Just In Time For Your Next Party!

Everyone likes to dress up their party space with some decorative lights, right?  Well, here's your chance to put a little extra "zing" to your holiday happenings.  These Living Dead Dolls Party Lights will go with any decor. 

* * *
(Catalog description:)

The infamous Living Dead Dolls faces show up on a strand of unbelievably deadly party lights. Ten heads light up with all the doom, gloom and deadly innocence your bedroom, Halloween party or Christmas tree has been waiting for! These string lights are a conversation piece you won't want to miss and a collectors item to have forever. Strand includes 10 three-inch heads strung with mini lights. UL approved AC plug for US or Europe.

More Finger Food

One thing's for sure.  No one can accuse them of using fillers!

Monday Movie Review - DEAD SNOW

At first, the tropes appear to be numerous in this movie.  Group of friends go off for a ski vacation -  check.  Friends become stranded in a snowstorm - check.  Friends start getting slaughtered by...

Wait a minute.  Just when you think it's time for the insane serial killer to start knocking off the too-dumb-to-live ski bunnies, this movie throws a legion of dead Nazi zombies at you.

Yes, you heard right.  The killers are dead Nazi zombies.

And to add hilarity to horror, the methods our heroes use to off the undead Third Reich are just as surprising.

This isn't exactly a date movie, but it's a terrific weekend no-brainer to share with fellow horror buffs.  Which is why my recommendation is a hearty

Finger Foods - a Second Bite

Of course, you must take great care when preparing those snackable tidbits.

(Don't you just love Photoshop?)

Finger Food

Hubby mentioned having friends over on the weekends to watch the football games.  He suggested we serve "finger food".

Bwahahahahahahaaaa!!!

(Found here.)

Monday Movie Review - MONSTERS

At first I had high hopes for this movie, especially in the wake of Cloverfield, and with the soon-to-be-released Skyline.  But the film didn't turn out exactly the way I thought it would.

A photographer down in Mexico is trying to get up-close shots of the Monsters that landed 6 years ago.  While there, he is called by his boss and told that boss's daughter was on vacation in Mexico, and got caught up in one of the attacks.  "Go find her and bring her back to the US."

The photographer finds her and tries to bring her back, but that means crossing the Infected Zone, which is a section of land hundreds of miles wide and long, and lying directly between the border of the US and the interior of Mexico.

What entails is their journey as they traverse through the dangerous territory to reach the US, encountering rogue militia, the ghastly remains of people and towns, and of course the Monsters, which resemble walking octopi to me (no spoiler here, folks.  You can see it in the trailers.)

This is not a horror movie filled with gore.  It hits above the collar, messing with your mind.  It fills you with "What if it was me?".   It makes you think.  It makes you cringe.

My first inclination was "meh", but the more I think on it, the more I realize I want to go back and view it again.  And again.

Which makes my recommendation: 

'Tis the Season!

Time To Get Your 2011 Calendar!

Available now at Bad Zombie.  But hurry!  Supplies are limited!

Monday Movie Review - THE BUTCHER

I personally rank horror movies into one of 3 categories:

1- those that purely entertain
2- those that disturb
3- those that sicken me to the point where I won't even review them

THE BUTCHER falls into the second category.

This movie uses the cinema verite technique in a way that surprises.  Several people wake up in an abandoned factory (or school, or someplace - we're not given an explanation), and quickly discover they're going to be sacrificed for "art".  In other words, their captors are filming snuff films, and they're the lucky "stars".  (Note:  This is the original Korean version, not the US remake.)

The movie starts out slow, building up the suspense, as we the audience watch what is happening via the camera helmet being worn by one victim.   Said victim soon ends up in the back room, along with his wife, and that's when the film goes from scarey to downright disturbing.  We witness the couple being brutalized with such intensity and realism via the helmet cam, that I had to turn my eyes away.

I hesitate to recommend this movie unless you have a strong stomach, or can detach yourself from it.  Honestly.  Leave the lights on, or - better yet - watch it during the day.

That being said, go

Horror 4 Sale

Cost is $3 each, which includes postage!
To see a listing of their contents, and to order,

go here.

HUGGER DOLL by Jane Toombs (Guest Blogger)

HUGGER DOLL
A novel of Supernatural horror
by Jane Toombs
From Double Dragon Publishing
http://www.double-dragon-ebooks.com/single.php?ISBN=1-55404-242-9

When a hugger doll enters Hally Varney’s life she doesn't at first understand the danger. But Police Sergeant Clint Hendrick soon realizes that he should have paid more attention to his old granny’s superstitions. He’s discovered the hard way that hugger dolls do exist and he’s got to figure out how to get rid of this one before it kills any more people. Before it kills him...

***
As a reader who loves E.A.Poe, A. Merritt and H.P. Lovecraft. I've always wanted to write a horror story.  Some of my paranormal is pretty dark, like my Moonrunner Trilogy, but it does have sort of " happy for now" endings, so it's not true horror even though what happens in the three books is horrific .  I finally read about hugger dolls in a book about back hills superstitions and knew I had the central figure of a horror story. Since I'd been writing Harlequin romances and historical romances for Kensington  before this it was quite a departure. ~ Jane

Monday Movie Review - AMUSEMENT

This is a perfect example where the trailer is better than the movie.  That being said, here's the nitty gritty:

Three girls taunt a young boy, who is showing one of the major tendencies of a possible serial killer (eg. torturing and killing little animals.)  They tattle on him.   Years later, as a grown man, he sets his sights on these now young women.  

There are no true scares, so-so camera work, and basically no logistical reason for the movie to exist.  The acting rates a 5 on a scale of 10, but otherwise this film is riddled with trite scenarios.  If you're looking for something to do a "Mystery Science Theater 3000" dialog to, this one's for you.

If you have a clown phobia, you might want to avoid this one.
Better yet, just go ahead and